Does your mind have a tendency to repeat things over and over and over? Did you know that negative emotions which seem to happen to you are actually made by you? If you change the ingredients that your brain uses to make emotions, you can change your emotional life! This is very exciting because this puts the control and responsibility back on you! Yes, you are the architect of your experience, you can take the steering wheel back and get some control!
Let me help you to understand the mind a little better. The mind’s goal is to process the information it has been given, it only has life experience to go by, so many of the things which you have experienced and given context to are what your brain uses for context and grouping. So back to the "processing," or tape playing that you experience. The mind will continue to “process” until you give context or meaning to what it is experiencing. In other words, your brain is trying to come up with an explanation of what is going on. The more you explain it in a positive light the better your brain can take that explanation and use it to create the emotion of your choosing. Does this mean that pain doesn't exist? Certainly not! But what it does mean is that much of the emotional pain we experience is due to the context we give it.
Here are some helpful tips for processing the ongoing tape player.
1. Notice your thoughts. Becoming aware of your thoughts is the first step. You might be thinking “I am very aware of my thoughts, they run through my head all day.” Awareness is a little more gentle, it takes notice, it says “I know that you are upset about this,” or “I know that needs to be taken care of.” Your mind is working hard to take care of you and to keep you safe, be gentle and kind with your response to your mind and you will find the “processing” goes more in the direction you intend.
2. Write down your thoughts. The very act of writing down your thoughts helps your mind to let go. You have consciously shown that you are aware.
3. Devise a plan.Once you are aware of the thoughts, devise a plan of action. What you will do to take care of the problem. Maybe that is reframing, meditating each day or anchoring yourself to positive thoughts each morning. Maybe it is scheduling an appointment with a coach or therapist. You will be surprised at the great relief you get just by knowing you have a plan of action!
4. Action.Following through on the plan that you have set will bring about the success you desire! You are the only one that can do the work of reprogramming your mind! Just do the steps and take notice of the success and peace that comes to you!
5. Give Back!Achieving your goal is only part of what will make you truly successful, the other most important part is giving back. It is when we begin to help others with what we have gone through ourselves that true peace and success remain. Your gratitude will increase as you become even more aware of how blessed you have become. You will increase your social life as you become even more generous with your time and resources.
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Wishing you a peaceful and successful Emotional Thought Life!