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Frustrated and Unhappy

Dear Coach,

I am no longer in love with my wife. I feel a divorce would be in the best interest of my 2 boys ages 7 and 9 years old. My wife is irritable and mean to them. She has gained a lot of weight and does not contribute around the house. I am very frustrated and unhappy!


Dear Frustrated,

I am sorry to hear you are in this difficult situation. I am certain this is not something that has happened overnight and it will certainly take some time to straighten out, nevertheless ALL things are possible with God. I am wondering what it is that is bothering your wife. Have you considered that she is probably very miserable as well. Approach her with some compassion and find out what you can do to help her. She may have lost her passion for life and she quite possibly feels trapped. Teach your sons to develop this compassion as well and have them help her around the house. Schedule some family outings in addition to creating some adventurous alone time with your wife. With your positive influence and love she is sure to at least respond to you. Then I would lovingly approach her with joint counseling for the two of you. Keep your hope and focus on the happy marriage with her that you desire. Keep in mind that divorce does not bring happiness, nor is it the cure. It hurts everyone involved, especially your two sons whom you love. Only in very rare cases is it even a good thing.

La Vonne Earl