Anger is often a catalyst for intensely negative behavior. It makes us do things we don’t want to do, like lash out ( Proverbs 14:3) or act without thinking. Anger makes really intelligent people act foolish.
Insecurity often breeds anger. Why? Because insecurity is related to feelings of low self worth that come from rejection, fears of abandonment, disappointment, & feeling inadequate. Over time insecure people can grow to resent the success and happiness of others. If not resolved and worked through, the poisons of resentment & bitterness can spill into our relationship leading to destruction.
So, how do we disarm anger??
The wisdom of God has a lot to do with the disarming of anger.
So, What does wisdom bring us that helps deal with anger? One word..patience.
Whoever is patient has great understanding. One who’s quick-tempered displays folly. (Proverbs 14:29)
Patience is one of the wisest virtues because it helps us stop, listen, and assess reality. Patience keeps us from acting too quickly based on what we’re feeling. Patience helps us take a deep breath, and see, really and truly, what matters most.
“The heart of the godly thinks carefully before speaking; the mouth of the wicked overflows with evil words.”
Steps to Healing from anger
1. Name it: learn to identify its source. Anger typically comes from fear, hurt, or frustration.
2. Delay it: “A fool gives full vent to anger, but a wise person quietly holds it back” (Proverbs 29:11)
3. Pray for the ability to recognize areas of self doubt then take control by asking God to heal any insecurities and resulting anger you may have.
4. Seek help to develop skills to deal with situations in a way that diffuse or lessen anger.
I’ve had experience in helping people unravel and recognize the root causes of their anger. It’s not always as straightforward as we expect. In your attempts to get to the primary cause of an anger problem you may find yourself dealing with a number of issues. That is OK, we will address each one of them as they come up, moving towards the goal of a life filled with freedom and joy.
As you persevere, God will give you the victory!